Steps to letting go ( originally written and posted on BayArt)

11813376_10204557902489015_6384658806916858962_n

Letting go

Without letting go of the past you will never be able to live in the present. I want to emphasize the importance of letting go of any grudges any regrets, losses, missed chances or broken hearts.

Forgiveness my experience

I never truly forgave my mother. I was and I still am in touch with her, we see each other. Much more than we used to. In the beginning months would past and she wouldn’t call. I now have a better relationship with her than ever. I believe that is because I finally peeled of the mask I glued onto myself as a result of protecting myself. My soul was still clinching on my dads once broken heart and on the past. I had poison of blame flowing through my veins. Poisoning my heart daily for 7 years and I never really admitted it to myself.  Admitting is a first step in every aspect of our lives. Being honest with yourself is the healthiest decision and the greatest favor you do in your lifetime. I am going to share some steps that I followed in my letting go process because that is a hard but rewarding process trust me.

Admitting it

I know it’s hard to admit firstly let alone allow yourself to release the thorns in your heart. Past can be a beautiful rose that we water and admire everyday even after it’s rotten. Past can be a bunch of thorns that we hold onto tightly because we think it is the only thing that can fill our scars. Specially than its hard to let it go because it is not a pleasant feeling to bleed but bleeding stops. We just need to let the wounds breathe.

Steps

  1. Cry it out – holding it in is just gathering all of the negative emotions in your body and mind. It will influence your health, both mental and physical. Negative emotions gather up and later lead to stress and depression.
  2. Collect your thoughts, see what experience thought you and what you gained from it – every bad experience in our life is a great lesson, we become a better and stronger person because of them.
  3. Meditate – Meditation is a big helper in every aspect of our life because we learn how to connect with ourselves in the deepest way possible. We unravel the truth; we learn how our mind really functions and how to treat it.
  4. Acknowledging your progress – It is always important to acknowledge your success, It keeps you motivated and it makes you push even harder.
  5. The only three options – you only truly have three options: moving yourself out of the situation, changing it or accepting it. If it is bothering you and affecting your life still than the first and the last option are obviously not working.
  6. Just talk – Talking is the key to moving on, share your thoughts and emotions with others, find people that been through the same or similar situations.
  7. Put on the other pair of shoes – See the situation from the other perspective; try to understand their reasons and emotions. Keep in mind we are all humans and we make mistakes. How we deal with them later is what makes the difference.
  8. Visualize your present reality – see what surrounds you know and how you feel and live in this moment.
  9. Metaphorically throw it away- I found this method in a book written by a Buddhist (“Don’t worry, be grumpy” by Ajahn Brahm) It works like magic. Write down all the negative thoughts on a ball or a piece of paper or glue them to a stick, visualize your past and everything you wrote down and throw it away. You can throw it in a garbage can or flush it down the toilet (don’t flush the stick or a ball of course) You can even organize a little event in your backyard, invite some friends, pour some glasses of wine and let that past go together.
  10. Write a letter- Words are so important, writing is a great therapy for anyone. Write a letter to yourself or to the person that wronged you. Write how you felt, how you feel but also don’t forget to write that you forgive them ( or yourself if that is the case).

I hope I could help you with this post. Im sending you all of my support and positive energy.

Lots of Love, Ellodie.

Advertisements

Random facts about random me

Since I will be getting pretty personal and upfront with you guys, I wanted you to get to know me a bit better. I personally think It is a lot easier to connect with somebody online (and in real life of course) if they share some random things about themselves.

50 facts about me

  1. I learned to read when I was three and a half years old.
  2. My favourite thing to do as I child was to sit in my grandpas lap and draw/paint with him (he is a painter). I still draw and paint up to this day.
  3. My parents were in a difficult financial trouble when I was a child so I painted a lot of pictures and sold them to people on my street so I can give the money to my parents.
  4. I made quite a lot of money actually but my parents never accepted it.
  5. My grandma is a spiritual healer she healed quite a few people in her life but she stopped doing it because people started to spread rumors.
  6. I was surrounded by animals from day one and I am so grateful for that.
  7. I love all animals but I admire horses the most.
  8. I became a vegetarian when I was 10 years old and I love it.
  9. My mom use to blend meat with my food and tried to trick me to eat it, I would always taste it and never eat it. I used to sit infront of the plate for hours untill she finally gave in.
  10. My parents fought all the time about money, from that moment on I promised myself that money will never influence anything in my life. Speacially not the relationships I have with people.
  11. My favourite food are pickles.
  12. My favourite snack are pickles with wasabi sauce and horseradish.
  13. My mom cheated on my dad.
  14. She told me weeks before she told my dad that she will devorce him. I had to keep it a secret.
  15. My favourite music genre now is classical music, when I was younger It was rock and heavy metal.
  16. My grandma is my favorite sibling, she thought me how to walk in our cottage where I would spend every summer and winter.
  17. I was in a abusive relationship.
  18. I thought that I knew what love is but I didn’t not untill I met my currrent boyfriend .
  19. We met online and just three days after we first met I committed suicide, he came to the hospital and he was the first thought in my mind when I woke up (during that time I was still in that abusive relationship).
  20. We have an interesting and complicated story, it is really a movie like love story.
  21. My first pet was a dog named Buki he was a pekingese, I had him till I was 14.
  22. I have a paw-shaped birthmark on my right leg.
  23. I live with my dad and my stepmom.
  24. I lived in a house next to the house of my grandparents and unckle, I moved when I was 15 to an appartment.
  25. My neighbourhood gets pretty scarry at night and I encounterned strangers I never want to met again.
  26. My favourite writer is Haruki Murakami and Pablo Neruda.
  27. I feel strangly connected with Ludwig Van Beethoven.
  28. My mom listened to Fur Elise all the time when she was pregnant with me.
  29. Fur Elise always was and still is my favourite song.
  30. I can see auras and energy fields.
  31. When I was little I remember I was talking to angels, I believe I did see them.
  32. I love conspiracy theores and occultism.
  33. I am scared of the dark and of mirrors.
  34. I always wanted to develop telekinesis abbility, I stopped practicing it daily. I will start again.
  35. Meditation helped to mend my anxiety and panic attacks greatly.
  36. I love water and water sounds. Water relaxes me more than anything else.
  37. I am an only child.
  38. I love deep conversations.
  39. I prefer sunset over sunrise.
  40. I believe sunset and candle light makes everyone so much more beutiful.
  41. I love falling in love. I fall in love on a regular basis in books,poems,art,natureand music.
  42. I believe in Laws of attraction.
  43. I suffer from anxiety, panic attacks,eating disorder, bipolar disorder and borderline personality disorder.
  44. I despise and dont belive in pills for mental disorders, everything can be healed with nature,meditation,water,love and conversations.
  45. I don’t take any pills for my disorders and I drank them only for 1 week ( I was diagnosed when I was 14, I am 19 now) and I am better than ever know.
  46. I healed and I am still healing my self with therapy I mentioned under number 43.
  47. I want to be an actor,writer and journalist.
  48. I feel fulfilled when I help people and animals, I believe that is my role on this earth.
  49. I am very emotional.
  50. I feel emotions and moods of other people before I even walk in the room.

My mood is oftenly changed by the emotions that are filling the space around me. I hope you liked this little tag I did.                                                                                                                 Have a lovely morning, day, evening and take care. Lots of love Ellodie.

20160721_080440